Lending a helping hand: how to give a handjob

Above all else, the hand job is convenient and allows you to do all the things you can’t do while performing oral sex. You can talk, kiss, make sustained eye contact, use it to tease more intimate sexual activity, or use it as an opportunity to feel and get familiar with your partner’s penis in the earlier stages of a sexual relationship. If your mouth is tired but you don’t want to pause the sensual flow, then you can revert to using your hands to keep up the energy. It’s a many splendoured thing!

The basics

Let’s assume you’ve never heard of a hand job before and strip it right down to the basics. A hand job is the stimulation of the penis for the purpose of sexual pleasure, and it’s usually called a hand job when it’s performed by someone else.

Crudely put, it’s the movement of the hand(s) up and down the penis – that’s it!

But, of course, there are ways to level up. You can start by adjusting your:

1) Grip

Not too hard, not too soft. Most people recommend holding the penis as tightly as you would a glass of water; you’re supporting, not suffocating.

2) Speed

Start slowly and build up the pace. If you’re trying to make your partner cum, you’ll probably need to generate some speed. Otherwise, it’s okay to vary the speed depending on the scenario. A slow and long make-out sesh calls for some equally slow and sensual touching. But if it’s hot and heavy, then match the energy!

3) Use lube

It just always helps. We’re channelling the oasis, not the desert. Some people use spit, but, being unhygienic and short-lasting, it's far from the best option. We'd recommend a lubricant that's made for the skin as well as pleasure, like our Front Lubricant. You could even go more luxurious and try out a Massage Oil.

It's been found that lube makes it 50% easier for both men and women to orgasm so in situations like these, it's a no-brainer.

From rookie to pro

Those are the very basics. But if you want to up your hand job game, you can use two hands instead of one for more depth of feeling. Another shout is forming a smaller ‘O’ shape with your thumb and forefinger and using this to focus specifically on the tip of the penis. It’s up to you what else you incorporate, but there are plenty of options. Kissing, lip-biting, intense eye contact – it’s all on the table, so experiment and find what’s right for you and your partner.

Big disclaimer: everyone has very different physical and sexual preferences. There is no universally applicable ‘how-to’ guide for sex. If in doubt, talk it out! Communication is key if you’re unsure in a sexual scenario. You can gently ask your partner if what you’re doing feels okay, or if you could do anything differently; let them know it’s fine to communicate those desires with you.

Have fun, have sex, and give hand jobs!

The Roam Team x